I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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