so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Randomize
