it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
