perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
