the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Randomize
