I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
two words: eviction party
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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