38 yer olds are good kisserssss
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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