it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Is it penis luge time yet?
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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