yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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