i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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