the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize