i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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