none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
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