This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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