I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
