We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
My vagina just clenched in fear
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