Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
