I wanna bring you to show and tell
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
