bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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