she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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