I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Randomize