I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I don't deserve a penis
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
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