Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Randomize
