Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
