I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
