i would punch a child for taco bell
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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