I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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