I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
lets start a swedish sibling band together
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Someone came in the potted fern
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
