so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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