He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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