so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
