How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
