seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize