just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
