I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
