I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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