I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Randomize
