another moral hangover. fuck.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
