I wish i was in the wii world.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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