i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
