I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Define "chronic" masturbator.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
you win again, gameday.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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