i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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