im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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