yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize