I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize