no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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