My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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