how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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