I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
