I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Randomize
