Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Randomize
